Tip of the Day: A Snotty Nose

For the longest time little kiddies are unable to blow through their noses. They will watch with fascination as you do it, but are incapable of copying. It is very frustrating for both parent and infant. For this reason there exist rubber bulbs with protruding nozzles that enable you to suck the gunk out of their heads. There also exist parents whose devotion is so dizzyingly blind to social mores, that they will literally clamp their mouths around their infants bubbling nostrils and suck out the snot.

I am not one of these people. If you are like me and squirm at the very notion of another being’s boogers, here is a tip to get you through this situation:

Tear off a line of around 4 sheets of toilet paper. Hold them length-ways and fold over half an inch at the top. With your arms spread, apply the near end of the paper to your kids snitcher; then run it along the full length of the 4 sheets. Depending on the gelatinousness of the offending gloop, you will find that snot begets snot and you are able to literally pull the stuff out of your kid’s head. When the length of the 4 tissues is done, fold over another half an inch and re-apply. Be very careful not to get any boogers at the end of the line of tissues, as this could lead to accidental contact. Which is gross.

A key bonus of this method is that having the snot pulled from your head is an exceedingly pleasing sensation. You might find your kid actually enjoys it.

I hope this comes in handy.

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