Baby on Board


These signs on the back bumpers of cars have always irritated me. Why should we be extra careful because we know there is a baby in a car? Are babies’ lives worth more than adults’? Logically they should mean less, as there literally is less. There is less body, less brain, less consciousness, less self-awareness, less personality, less knowledge and less hair (usually). The only thing they have more of is potentiality and that is a very slippery subject.

I now find myself in a new situation. If I could drive I wouldn’t hesitate to buy one of these stickers. In fact I’d encase the whole car in egg cartons and foam if I thought it would protect Billy. I’d look a right pillock driving such a vehicle, but don’t all fathers look inherently uncool anyway? Who cares anymore? Not me.

He seems so fragile that almost everything outside the apartment has become intolerably brutal. 10 ton hunks of metal hurtling down the street, rapists and lunatics ready to pounce at every corner, deadly viruses exhaled from the mouths of passers by and of course the nasty weather. I am so scared he’ll get pneumonia or frostbite I check his stroller every 5 minutes to see if a limb is protruding from his 15 layers of clothing and 5 blankets.

He had 2 red blotches on his neck and one on his leg this morning so I was worried today. He had a temperature when I got home and was acting strange, so I am worried now. It never ends.

Here is a video of him being a froggy this morning.


Click the TV for video. Quicktime 7 required.

Read More